How to overcome fear psychology. How to overcome fear: working on yourself will open the way to freedom


We periodically need to get out of the comfort zone and act in one way or another, taking risks or back. The only thing that gets in the way is fear from time to time. Of course, fear is created by nature as a quality that protects against any misconduct. But it happens that this property becomes so strong that it obscures the clarity of mind and the ability to perceive what is happening in the light of rationality. and rise above them? - This is a question that almost every person asks himself at some point in his life.

The more life experience, the stronger the fear

The newborn does not know fear because he has never experienced it. Gradually, as you gain life experience and the emergence of diverse situations, a person begins to be afraid. He has an understanding that a certain situation can end unfavorably.

Such negative thoughts interfere with living a full life. To improve the situation, you just need to realize the need to solve the problem, since everyone can overcome fears. With an increase in negative experience, a person fears everything. more unfavorable factors. At the same time, the negative experience of different people differs from each other. Therefore, it is far from always that what frightens one person causes similar sensations in his acquaintances.

Fear of experiencing fear

Over time, a person may begin to fear situations that cause fear. That is, he is not afraid of any object, namely the feeling of fear. Such a person makes efforts to consciously avoid relevant situations.

In this case, you need to identify the cause of fear, and then engage in the development of self-confidence. Do not assume that the task is large and impossible. In fact, it’s just worth dividing it into small sub-items, which require almost no additional effort to complete. This is especially true for athletes. And after completing small tasks, you should deal with larger issues.

Don't Suppress Fear

Those who are in a state are deprived of the ability to make decisions and act. Fear can arise before some new actions that have not been done before. If a person has become interested in how to overcome fears, then first you need to admit to yourself that they exist. Because only if you honestly discover these qualities in yourself, you can take measures to eliminate them.

It is better to act, despite. If you repeat this several times, then gradually it turns out to overcome your fear. After all, it just gets in the way. Therefore, you need to make every effort, because to overcome fears is to make them afraid of themselves.

Making a willful decision

As long as there is no clear program regarding their actions, fear increases. Therefore, you need to make a decision about how to act in this situation. After a certain course of action has appeared, fear shrinks into a ball. Of course, he waits for some time to see whether the decision will be accurately implemented. But when it turns out that a person is not going to deviate from the intended plan of action, the fear becomes less and less until it disappears completely.

What is fear? - only emotion. She is able to fill everything with herself, becoming a large jellyfish. Is it really worth allowing this unreasonable "object" to influence own life? Of course not. That is why it should be turned into a small compressed ball, which subsequently disappears.

When making a decision, a person may worry about its correctness. If you look at the question from the point of view of rationality, it becomes clear that any action is always preferable to fear of the unknown. After the first steps are taken in the direction taken, the situation becomes clear. And it becomes possible to turn it in the right direction.

The worst turn of events

In overcoming fear, it often helps to work out the question "how to overcome fear of the unknown?" That is, in this case, one should reflect on the topic: what will happen if ... Usually, such reasoning lifts the veil of secrecy and it becomes clear that the outcome is, in principle, not dangerous. Often people think that the result will be frightening. But with the help of this exercise, with a good example, it gradually becomes clear that the problem disappears.

If it turned out that the unpleasant sensations persisted, then we should think about what the inner voice is telling us. Therefore, if intuition really saved from an unfavorable event, then this is just wonderful. In such cases, you need to rejoice in your own sensitivity and thank her for salvation.

Analysis of the situation

Careful consideration of what is happening without concealing unfavorable and “ugly” qualities from oneself is the best option for dealing with fear. The analysis helps to understand the following points:

  1. What exactly is scary?
  2. What causes fear?
  3. Is it worth spending your inner reserve on a negative emotion?

The list can be continued until an internal state of satisfaction is obtained. The essence of the method is a thorough study of the "enemy". Because only knowing your fear fully, you can learn how to overcome it.

And if there are several options for eliminating fear, then you need to work through each of them. It helps to use your own imagination, because when you scroll through the situation in it, it becomes very clear. A person who has overcome fear always figured out in advance how to do it.

Someone might think that analysis is something long and boring. In fact, it is absolutely not true. It is very interesting to reveal the positive and the negative without obscuring it with anything. After all, it is not necessary for anyone to provide the information received. She's only going for herself.

Common phobia: Fear of death

So many deaths that are considered normal. But it happens that everything becomes very serious and turns into such phobias as:

  1. Swim in the sea.
  2. Ride a car.
  3. Touch the handrails in public transport and others.

It is worth accepting your death as a phenomenon that is the logical outcome of the life of every person. Since to overcome the fear of death is to actually understand the beauty of the present moment. Yes, everything will end, and even King Solomon did not escape this. That is why you need to appreciate every breath you take, and make every action consciously.

And if a person is afraid to live?

You should rejoice at what is happening, perceive it from a positive point of view. Even if situations develop in an unfavorable way, they should be taken as a test. It is better to consider them as lessons. After all, a person is born in order to become better, to learn something.

And those individuals who are afraid to leave the house in the morning are likely to wake up in their declining years. They will understand that their whole life has passed by, and nothing has been done. And in order to avoid such a turn, one should think about the questions: is there any point in experiencing the fear of life? How to overcome it?

Childbirth is painful

Expectant mothers are always very worried before childbirth. This is due to whether everything is prepared for the future baby at home. Also, any woman is worried about such issues:

  1. How to deal with pain.
  2. Is there enough strength?
  3. Will everything go well and so on.

Since overcoming the fear of childbirth is already the key to the success of the event, you should work on it. As for the pain, you should realize that it will be very strong and accept it as it is. You need to take care of physical fitness and health for 9 months, following the recommendations of the doctor and attending special courses for expectant mothers. As to whether everything will go well, the doctor should think. Therefore, before giving birth, you should take care of a good specialist.

The main thing is to tune in to the positive. For each of your actions, only favorable views should be taken as the basis. And in such an important matter as the birth of a new person, this rule should be considered an axiom. Everything will be fine, because there are simply no other options.

What if you're scared to board a plane?

The media do not always feel sorry for the public when they talk about unsuccessful flights. Often the information is accompanied by colorful photographs or a meaningful video. At the same time, impressionable citizens decide to travel long distances exclusively by trains.

Trains are very good, although much longer. But how to overcome the fear of flying if you need to get to another continent? The most best recommendation It's about getting away from what's going on. If the person sitting next to you is disposed to communication, then you can get to know him. Communication with a fellow traveler is a pretty strong distraction. No need to drink coffee, because the heart rate will increase and the excitement will increase. It is preferable to pay attention to alcohol, which will help relieve stress.

Fear is part of life. Every person is afraid of something. Even, for example, a very strong and formidable athlete, to whom everyone around respectfully nods, is also capable of experiencing. Perhaps he is afraid to eat a product with the presence of Escherichia coli in it. Options can be very diverse. And this does not mean that you need to surround yourself with a vacuum. After such an act, life turns into existence, and its taste simply disappears. That is why it is necessary to answer the question for yourself: “How to learn to overcome fears?” And first they should be identified and subjected to a thorough analysis.

Friends, we all know fear. Let's talk about this unpleasant condition and try to find out how it can be overcome. First you need to understand what it is in general, find out, as they say, what it is eaten with and what kind of animal it is.

What is fear and how to overcome it

This is emotion. This is the STRONGEST negative human emotion. Stronger than all the others put together. But where does it come from? After all, everyone knows that children from birth are practically unaware of fear. They are only afraid of falling from a height and loud noises. Everything. But this is a natural fear based on the instinct of self-preservation.

We acquire all our other phobias later, as they say, along the way. As a reaction to certain events. And the root of it all is our negative beliefs that we can't handle life on our own.

In short, it greatly interferes with our lives. Especially to achieve your goals. Even the smallest ones, not to mention achieving significant success or doing something outstanding.

Only one thing makes the realization of the Dream impossible - it is the fear of failure..

Paolo Coelho

Fear is the killer of dreams!

It can and must be overcome. There are many ways, but I chose 5 of the most effective ones.

Method number 1 how to overcome fear. DEBRIEFING

Here you need to prepare. Preparation consists of 2 stages

  1. Detailed Analysis
  2. Visualization

At the first stage, the most important thing is to deal with fear and understand what you are afraid of. To do this, answer yourself the following questions:

  1. What am I afraid of?
  2. Why am I afraid?
  3. Does fear have a real basis?
  4. What am I more afraid of doing it or not being able to do it?

Do a detailed analysis of your fears and deal with yours anxieties. These will be your logical actions. And although human emotions are stronger than logic, and “persuading yourself” is not always possible, nevertheless, “debriefing” is a good “artillery preparation” before the battle with this strong emotion.

After we sorted out the fear on the shelves, we proceed to the second stage - the presentation of the situation. Here we will beat fear with its own weapon - emotions. Emotions will help us overcome it

Here will come to the rescue. The main thing is that now you already know what you are afraid of. Sit back and start repeatedly scroll on the internal screen pictures of your fears, where you managed to overcome it, for example, how you do what you are afraid of. The mind does not distinguish fiction from reality and will take everything at face value! And a picture will be imprinted in your subconscious repeatedly overcome fear!

The method is very effective! Even a one-time five-minute visualization can drastically lower your fear level.

Method number 2 how to become fearless. MAKE A DECISION!

Sometimes, DECISION MAKING alone can make you do what you fear. When you are determined to do something, the fear will immediately disappear. As well as doubts. Doubt breeds fear, and the decision to act removes doubt, and therefore neutralizes it. No doubts - no fears! I made a decision - doubts away!

The eyes are afraid, but the hands are doing

Fear causes us negative emotions, and DETERMINATION forms a positive attitude and includes positive ones. Positive emotions displace fear and give us self-confidence and self-confidence!

Go to the mirror, look into your eyes and say decisively: “Despite the fact that I am scared, I will do it! No matter what!"

Method number 3 how to overcome your fear. DO IT!

Get used to acting, despite the fear! Remember that fear is just a common reaction to your attempt to do something out of the ordinary. Something you've never done before. Did not speak publicly, for example.

Also, fear can arise if you go against your beliefs. Throughout our lives, we develop our own concepts, our own worldview. And when we try to change something in our life, turn in a different direction, then we have to leave the "comfort zone", and this automatically causes fear, doubt and insecurity.

None of us are born successful. And no one from childhood taught how to be. Therefore, we will have to overcome fear in order to fulfill our dreams and achieve our goals. We'll have to learn to act, despite the fear. Action and more action!

You go forward - fear does not take

To overcome fear, you need to stop fighting it. Recognize it and accept it. After all, we are not superheroes. Tell yourself, "Yes, I'm scared. I'm really scared. But I'll do it anyway!"

When we admit our fears to ourselves, we kill two birds with one stone. Firstly This is how we relieve internal stress and accept ourselves as we are. Secondly When we admit to ourselves, fear begins to celebrate its victory and ceases to act on us. He is weakening! And this is where you need to start taking action. And immediately!

Method number 4 how to overcome fear. ACCEPT THE WORST OPTION

Everything is very simple here. Imagine the worst possible scenario.

Ask yourself, "What's the worst thing that could happen to me if I do this?" And imagine this picture. Live it and be filled with emotions. Accept this option and get used to it.

Repeat this exercise several times and you will feel how it becomes easier for you. Fear goes away and anxiety disappears. You will stop worrying, calm down and start thinking clearly. And most likely you will understand that your fear was exaggerated and not everything is so sad. This is how fearlessness comes about.

The devil is not as scary as he is painted

Well, if your fear is not to do anything and you still continue to be afraid, then most likely your fears are justified and you should think about whether you should take this step. After all, fear is our defensive reaction, based on a sense of self-preservation.

How do you know if the fear is justified?

I will give two examples.

  • You are in your 30s and not yet married. You have a girl you are dating and you want to propose. But you are afraid to do it, because you have never made offers before. We ask the magic question: "What's the worst that could come out of this?" The answer is you will be rejected. We develop the topic further - it means that this is not my soul mate, but the Universe is preparing a meeting with my man, it's just that the time has not come yet. Everything, fear as it happened.
  • You have a goal - to learn to ski. But you were brought to a very steep mountain and offered to go down. Naturally, you are scared. Worst case, you'll break something. And the option is quite real. You can apply the above methods and start descending. You will no longer be afraid. But maybe it makes sense to start driving from a place lower, where it is not so dangerous?

Fear has big eyes

Assess the validity of your fears. If they are real enough and have “solid ground” under them, then it is better to listen to them and not get into trouble. Well, if the worst option does not cause strong negative emotions in you and you can put up with it, then, as they say, go ahead with the song!

Method number 5 how to overcome fear. FEARLESS TRAINING

In order for fear to never stand in your way, you need to understand that it is not a problem, but an OBJECT OF FEAR. Fear by itself means nothing and should not be feared! People are so afraid of him that they exclude almost all situations where he can arise from their lives. Instead of taking it and overcoming it once, thereby impoverishing your life and making it uninteresting! But this is a straight road with misfortune.

So, in the beginning we determine the object of fear. Then we begin the training of fearlessness.

Who is bolder - the lighter

Fearlessness (courage, courage) can be trained. Just like muscles in the gym. First you take a small weight, work with it, then move on to a larger one. Likewise with fear.

How to overcome, for example, the fear of public speaking? To begin, stand in front of you. Then in front of parents or children. Then gather your friends and make a speech there. Speaking in front of 10 people is not as scary as speaking in front of a thousand people. Once you're comfortable with one step, move on to the next. Until you feel comfortable.

Or, for example, you are a shy person and do not make good contact with strangers. We are going the same way. To overcome this kind of fear in yourself, start simply by SMILEING TO PASSERING BY. You will see people smile back at you. Then try to say hello, first just nod your head, and then just say "Hello!" or "Hi!" Don't be afraid, no one will eat you! Then try to start a light conversation, for example, with a roommate. public transport or in line for something. Gradually, step by step, you will overcome the fear of communicating with strangers. Slowly but surely, it will fade away and you will turn into a super-sociable person!

These questions are very relevant in different periods of life for many people. It is said that the brave is not the one who is not afraid of anything, but the one who is able to act in spite of his fear. In this article, I will list nine simple but extremely powerful methods that are open to everyone, and which will help you overcome your fear and gain confidence in your abilities.

The first way to get rid of fear and self-doubt- this "stage loading". The main idea of ​​this method is to act in stages (gradually). For example, if a person is very afraid of heights, and cannot even think about getting on a plane, it is completely unnecessary to start actions that cause a very strong fear. At first, he can take a minimal step: carefully approach the window of the sixth floor, make sure that everything is fine and carefully look at what is outside the window. Regarding you, this can be any situation, in general, any small step, due to which you would slightly go beyond your own to meet yours. If a person is terribly afraid of dating, you can symbolically call a compliment to any person of the opposite sex the very first step, and an offer to go on a date with a specific person is the sixth step. You will be surprised how easy it will be for you to take the sixth step after the fifth, and the fifth after the fourth. "Phased loads" make it possible to go on an easy road to difficult loads. Over time, you begin to easily overcome any fears and self-doubt in such moments of life that once looked insurmountable.

The second way to get rid of fear and self-doubt- this "depreciation". The fact is that some things in which we experience uncertainty and are simply afraid are moments of our life to which we attach excessive importance, give them great significance. And, conversely, the lighter and more insignificant we treat these moments, the less we worry about them. For example, if you are a timid sales manager and are unsure of yourself, and you are worried that a banner ad for seven kopecks will hit the client’s wallet very hard, and he will consider that you are impudent, of course, then you will never be able to sell nothing really significant. And if you can, then this will be a significant exception. In this aspect, it is simply not necessary to attach importance to money. A self-confident person for the same service can easily, as a matter of course, get a decent payment, simply because it is absolutely normal, and there is nothing special about it that could be given great importance. Getting rid of fear and uncertainty in public affairs essentially leads to the devaluation of these affairs, to the fact that you relate to these matters more easily, without giving excessive significance to what is happening. Perhaps this view will seem too practical to you. If you want baseless experiences, no one can stop you from doing so.

The third way to get rid of fear and self-doubt- this "spontaneous action". When, for example, we are preparing a speech in advance for an upcoming seminar at work, or remarks that we will speak, at that moment we "recharge"(potentially redundant) value that we will attach to this situation. And as mentioned above, the more importance you attach, the more actively you reflect, scrolling through the situation in your head, the more you will experience fear and self-doubt. things are needed. But, when the plan is spinning over and over again in the head, it only leads to even more excitement. If you have made a plan that completely satisfies you, it's time to turn off your mind and move on to. If in the upcoming conversation, you want to express understandable specific thoughts, it is better to simply remember these thoughts without bringing it into the planned speech. Further, guided by the situation, you can express these thoughts spontaneously, as it goes. This way they will sound more confident. To, and defeat uncertainty - spontaneous action is sometimes the only way out. If you have made a decision, you just need to do it, not paying attention to "shiver" mind. During conscious spontaneous action, you are focused on what you are doing now, and not on how "scary". I think you have heard this phrase more than once: "The eyes are afraid, but the hands are doing."

The fourth way to get rid of fear and self-doubt"a real example of bravery". Almost magically, we are affected by a real example when you watch how a confident, experienced person acts in a situation that makes you worry. This illustrative example is easily and quickly able to destroy the inner barrier that forced you to experience fear and self-doubt in such situations. You just look at a real example that in this situation you can simply and easily act confidently, without any fears. Complexes have no place here, they are simply superfluous. It happens that people choose difficult paths, systematic career development Step by step, year by year. And then suddenly you observe how next to them a stupid "hillbilly" suddenly overtakes them in a short period of time, only because he acts decisively and confidently, without attaching excessive importance to the local hierarchy and becomes closest to the general "feeder". Such a (real) example is able to outrage, and can teach a lot.

The fifth way to get rid of fears and self-doubt- this . Such a method can be called physiological, because through, we influence the state of mind. The more agitated and disturbed the mind, the stronger the internal tension will be displayed. The state of mind and body are interconnected. If the mind is tense, the body is also tense. Conversely, by relaxing our body, we relax and calm our mind. At the same time, you can also direct your attention to calming the breath. It will be best not at the moment of relaxation of an already tense body, but when initially, thanks to relaxation, we do not allow all kinds of tensions.

The sixth way to get rid of fears and self-doubt- this "understanding". In fact, we are afraid to do something when we are not exactly sure that we need it. It is important to know what you really want. If you have made a decision to invite the person you like on a date, but feel fear and self-doubt, you need to analyze what exactly you are afraid of. Rejection in itself is not terrible. This is fine. Most often, the one who invites you on a date, without realizing it, is afraid of looking stupid and awkward. The more he fears this, the more clumsily he behaves. In this case, it is better to return to the method "spontaneity" and just act. But not everything is as easy as it seems. Sometimes "inviting", again, not fully realizing why he feels fear and insecurity, in reality, he is simply afraid of responsibility. Maybe he is afraid to disappoint his chosen one, or on a subconscious level, he predicts all sorts of problems. In such a situation, even if there are doubts, you just need to decide: or "Yes", or "No". And if "Yes", then we again return to decisive spontaneous actions. If "No" then there is nothing to regret. The most important thing is that the decision made should be conscious. Of course, at first everything can be pre-weighed, but you should not get carried away with reflection, and do not play your fears in your head several times.

The seventh way to get rid of fears and self-doubt"awareness". This is one of the most powerful ways. Otherwise, awareness can be called as knowledge, or professionalism. For example, when you get a job, being an amateur in business, you may feel insecure, because. you cannot know in advance whether you will cope with the given tasks. In this case, the first time of work turns into one huge continuous exam, which can turn into a long-term one. And if you own this topic and you are a professional, then why should you be afraid. You have confidence in your abilities inside, based on many years of experience. Therefore, training is often the best remedy for self-doubt. Primitive people feared natural phenomena, because they did not know, even approximately, what lightning is: heavenly punishment, or electric charge in the atmosphere. method or method "awareness" something similar to the sixth way "understanding". The difference is that for the method "understanding" You don't have to be deep "professional" understanding of the situation. You just need to make a decision. Seventh way "awareness" most often leads to spontaneous decision making.

The eighth way to get rid of fears and self-doubt- this "friendliness". This method is not suitable for every situation, but it happens that it is indispensable. And this time, we tend to experience fear, anxiety and self-doubt when talking to some boss or other person important to us. It is quite easy to overcome a similar fear with a simple friendly attitude. If you are friendly and behave respectfully (even without owning this situation), "truth" stay by your side and you have nothing to worry about. Only a coward can offend those who (relative to the situation) are weaker than him. Psychologically, the one who supports this world will be right, and fear is not appropriate here.

The ninth way to get rid of fears and self-doubt- this "self-knowledge". It happens that a person is unsure of his abilities just because he is not, and his self-identification directly depends on the opinions of others. If someone likes him, he feels encouraged and his self-confidence increases. If a person is harshly criticized, self-confidence drops sharply. All this happens as if a person does not know himself at all, what he really is, and receives this information exclusively from other people. It must be remembered that understanding other people is also subjective. Most people often fail to understand themselves, let alone give a sober assessment of your actions. To know yourself means to accept yourself as you are. If you are not ashamed to be yourself, you are able to act without fear. When you know yourself, you simply express yourself sincerely as you are. However, everything has its time and place.

In this article, the main idea was about overcoming fears, worries and self-doubt that prevent a person from doing anything. It must be remembered that by cracking your next fear, you open up an additional opportunity for yourself to become stronger. No need to justify yourself when someone pities you and supports your fears. These are all temptations that make us weak-willed and weak. Overcoming fears and self-doubt does not mean rash acts putting your life at risk. To meet your fears means to develop, learn, become wiser, kinder and stronger.

There lived and lived for himself one decrepit, dissatisfied beast in a swamp beyond the edge of the forest. And one day, by pure chance or out of terrible boredom, he started a conversation with a tiny bird flying near his swamp. And the bird told the disgruntled animal that somewhere on the opposite side of the forest there is a magical garden in which fantastic fruits grow, after eating which many animals are transformed. The displeased beast listened to the bird, opening its mouth in amazement, and suddenly something in his head stirred in an unusual way for him. The bird flew away, and the beast was again left alone with itself.

But something has changed dramatically. On the basis of a routine gray everyday life, excitement began to grow in the soul of a disgruntled beast. The Beast began to talk about how he would leave his usual stinking swamp and go in search of a magical garden. So another year passed, or a year and a half. The everyday gray routine enveloped him comfortably and warmly, but the excitement still remained in his soul. It happened that the beast had nightmares, where he left his usual swamp. He woke up drenched in sweat, relieved to realize that he was still there, in his old familiar swamp. But over time, after another two or three years, the disgruntled beast finally realized that in this stinking swamp of his, everything is already so familiar and familiar that there is no point in staying here any longer. It dawned on him that he would never know what was waiting for him beyond the edge of the forest until he got out of the quagmire.

At first, in the first two weeks, he stuck out two paws and a muzzle out of the swamp. Then, making sure that nothing bad happened to him, he completely got out of the swamp, and began his independent path, which was filled with various adventures, dangers, worries, joys and new experiences. And this all went on until the displeased beast suddenly noticed that he had been moving around the magic garden for a long time, and that he was no longer dissatisfied at all, but brave and cheerful. He noticed that during this time large golden wings had grown in him, and his body had become powerful and toned. He never regretted that he left his familiar swamp to find a magical garden.

How to get rid of fear, fear

Like

We all face fear from time to time, and in some cases it is fear that keeps us safe. But sometimes fear gets in the way Everyday life. If you want to overcome fear, this article is for you.

Steps

Part 1

Understand the reason for the fear

    It is important to take action in time if the fear turns into an obsession or phobia. It's perfectly normal to be afraid of something. Most likely, you were scared to ride a bike when you first got on it, maybe you were scared to interview for a new job. However, when fears begin to control your entire life and affect you negatively, it becomes a real problem. If you feel that your fear turns into a phobia, it starts to cause severe stress that affects your life, you may feel restless and nervous. Focus on your fears and try to understand how much they affect your life. Are you unable to move forward towards your goals because of your fears? Here are a few signs that your fear is developing into a bigger problem:

    • fear makes you feel anxious and panicked;
    • you understand that your fear is unfounded;
    • you begin to avoid certain places and situations;
    • trying to ignore this fear causes you stress and prevents you from living a peaceful life;
    • this fear has existed for six months (or longer).
  1. Understand the symptoms of fear. Fears often manifest as phobias, which can include situational phobias (such as fear of public speaking), fear of certain animals (snakes or spiders), fear of blood, injections, and so on. When you experience fear, there are various physiological, intellectual and emotional responses that may include:

    • increased heartbeat;
    • labored breathing;
    • dizziness;
    • severe sweating;
    • overwhelming panic and anxiety;
    • the need to disappear;
    • feeling of detachment;
    • feeling like you might faint or die;
    • feeling powerless over your fear, even though you know it is irrational.
  2. Think about any traumatic events. If you are in a car accident, driving a car can be a scary and intimidating activity that you will try to avoid. You may have been robbed on your way home one day, and the thought of returning home after work automatically triggers panic. There are many ways to deal with fears, and naturally avoiding any traumatic event is one of them.

    • Although fear is an adequate response of the body to various traumatic events and situations, some of them are simply inevitable. Recognize that your fear is real and that this problem needs to be addressed.
  3. Consider that many fears come from childhood. Perhaps you are very afraid of snakes, but you cannot even understand where this fear comes from. Some research suggests that fears can begin as early as childhood, and children can pick them up from their parents through a special "biological" connection. Other data suggests that children "process" information about the world around them, and they develop certain fears and concerns, because they observe different events and can pose a threat. By watching how adults interact with some object or situation, the child learns to create associations, among which there is the association of “terrible” or “potentially dangerous” (regardless of the actual risk).

    Recognize that it's okay to be afraid of something. Fear is an adaptive property of our body, which in some way prolongs our life. Do you feel fear when you approach the edge of a cliff? This is an adaptive fear, and it kind of says to you: “This is very dangerous and could cost you your life! Be careful!" It is fear that causes the “fight or flight” response in our body, and this reaction prepares our body for the actions necessary for its own protection.

    • Understand that fear can be quite useful, remember the positive protective role it plays.

    Part 2

    Learn to deal with your fear
    1. Recognize your specific fears. It is easy to ignore or deny your fears, even to yourself. But you won't be able to turn on courage until you face your fear. Acknowledging your feelings is the first step to taking control of the situation.

      • Name your fear. Sometimes fear makes itself felt instantly and quite clearly, but there are times when it is difficult to understand the disturbing feelings that lurk in the depths of our mind. Try to draw out your fear and name it. This may be a specific fear (eg fear of cats) or situational (eg fear of being called to the blackboard).
      • Don't judge your fears. Acknowledge your feelings without dividing them into "good" and "bad".
    2. Recognize triggers. Is it something obvious, like a snake on the road? Perhaps when you walk past your psychologist's door at work, you immediately remember walking down the halls in high school? Find out what exactly causes you fear. The more you understand and acknowledge your fear, the easier it will be to deal with it.

      Ask yourself how much is this fear holding you back and controlling you? Because of your fear, you are forced to stay at home instead of going to a lesson that you are terribly afraid of? Are you unable to see your relatives because you are afraid of flying? Find out how strong your fear is, how much it controls your mind and your life.

    3. Present the desired result. Now that you have become more aware of your fear, think about what exactly you would like to change. Think about how you will live without this fear. How are you feeling? For example:

      • If your fear is an obligation, imagine a happy relationship with your partner.
      • If your fear is heights, imagine that you are hiking. Try to feel a sense of accomplishment.
      • If you are afraid of spiders, imagine that you saw a spider, but took it easy.

    Part 3

    Face your fears face to face
    1. Learn to recognize false beliefs. Many fears are based precisely on false beliefs or catastrophic thinking. That is, when you see a spider, you can immediately think that this spider will definitely harm you, because of it you can even die. Learn to identify these thought patterns and challenge them. Find more information about your fear on the Internet and understand that the actual risk is many times less than you think. Recognize that even the worst case scenario is unlikely. Start rearranging your thoughts so that you don't engage in catastrophic thinking, start interacting with those thoughts.

      • When fear arises, pause and reflect on the actual risk. Return to your negative thoughts and false beliefs and say, “I recognize the fact that some dogs are very aggressive, but most dogs are gentle and kind creatures. They probably won't bite me."
    2. Try to practice gradual interaction. Once you become aware of your fears and false beliefs, begin to deliberately and gradually face that fear. Often we are afraid of something because we have hardly experienced it. "Fear of the unknown" is a frequently used phrase that describes the feelings of people who have just encountered something new.

      • If you're afraid of dogs, start small: find a cartoon image of a stupidly painted dog on the Internet. Look at the image until you feel no fear.
      • Then look at a photo of a real dog, then do the same with a video. Explore different images of dogs until you feel that the fear is gone.
      • Then head to the park, where the owners often walk their dogs, and watch the animals until you are no longer afraid.
      • Go visit a friend who has a dog. Watch him interact with the pet until you feel calm.
      • Ask a friend if you can pet his dog while he plays with it. Pet the animal until you are no longer afraid.
      • Finally, the final step: stay with the dog and spend the whole day alone with the animal.
    3. Try to face your fear more often. The power that awareness of your emotions gives you is very important for understanding yourself and your feelings and sensations. In addition, exposing yourself to fear and deliberately verbalizing your fears gives you tremendous power and helps you fight fear and control your emotions. There have been a number of studies that have looked at the case of fear of spiders. Participants who acknowledged their fears (“I am very afraid of this spider) and interacted with the spider once showed much less fear the next week when they saw another spider.

      • Running away from fear will not help you get rid of it. The next time you happen to feel fear, try to understand it using words that will help describe your fear and anxiety.
    4. Learn relaxation techniques. When your body experiences fear, many triggers prepare your body for a fight-or-flight response. Learn to anticipate this response and counter it using relaxation techniques. Relaxation helps you to understand that you are safe, you are not in danger. In addition, relaxation will help to cope with anxiety and stress.

      • Try breathing exercises. Focus on your breath and start counting each inhalation and exhalation: inhale for four seconds, then exhale for four seconds. Once you feel comfortable, start inhaling and exhaling for 6 seconds.
      • If you notice that your muscles are tense, try to focus on relaxing them. One way to do this is to tense all the muscles in your body for three seconds and then relax them. Do this exercise two or three times to relax your entire body.

    Relax the power of fear. Fear can be incredibly powerful in situations that involve life or death. People who have been subjected to such fear speak of a feeling of "time slowing down", at such moments they feel a special surge of energy and instinctively know what to do. While other physiological processes take only half a second to trigger a response in the body, the fear system works much faster. Fear also drowns out the feeling of pain.

    • Understanding the positive aspects of fear will help you use this emotion to your advantage. For example, many people experience stage fright, but this fear can help increase productivity and focus on what's in this moment in front of you. Learn to recognize and be aware of your fear, direct it where it will be most useful.
    • Most people experience fear of an event, but once they are in that event, they no longer feel fear. Remember that fear amplifies all your feelings, so you can perform a certain task more efficiently and efficiently.
  4. Start seeing fear as an opportunity. Fear can be used as a tool to help us identify problems and solve them effectively. This is a guide, a red flag that warns us that some event or business requires special attention. Once the discomfort of the initial manifestations of fear has passed, try to better understand your fear to see what you can learn from it.

    • When you feel fear of something unfamiliar, take it as a sign that you need to get to know the person or situation better.
    • If you feel a surge of fear due to an upcoming event, make a plan of action to fully prepare for the event. For example, you can describe your steps on paper, you can rehearse before a performance, or develop your speech.
  • Consider consulting a psychologist if you feel like your fears are literally taking over you and your life. A qualified specialist will help you understand the sources of your fears and come up with ways to deal with them.
  • Use your imagination to reassure yourself, not scare yourself even more.
  • Don't give up! It takes courage and energy to fight fear. When you encounter setbacks, it can be tempting to give up on those attempts. But be determined and persevere, even when it seems impossible.

Warnings

  • Never do anything too dangerous to face your fear. Be sure to take care of your safety when facing your fears.

Fear is a natural reaction caused by the environment. We are born virtually devoid of fear. The only fear inherent in babies is the fear of falling from a height and the fear of loud noises. All other fears arise later as a reaction to certain events. And the root of them all is the belief that we are not capable of coping with life.

But it is very important for any person to be able to overcome fear, because otherwise he will not be able to reach any, even the smallest, height in his life, not to mention achieving success or fulfilling his dreams. There are many ways to overcome fear. Below I will describe five very effective methods by which a person can overcome any fear.

How to overcome fear
METHOD 1: JUST DO IT (JUST DO IT)

Build the habit of acting in spite of fear. Realize that fear is a normal reaction that you have in response to an attempt to take actions that are unusual for you. Fear can also arise from trying to act against one's beliefs. You see, every person develops a certain worldview over a long period, and when he tries to change it, he always steps over fear, he must overcome fear. Depending on the strength of a particular belief, fear can be strong or weak.

We are not born successful. And usually we are brought up far from what successful people should be, therefore, if we still want to achieve our goals and dreams, we must learn to overcome fear. Learn to act in spite of fear. Say to yourself: "Yes, I'm scared, I'm very scared, but nevertheless I will do it." As long as you procrastinate, fear triumphs and grows stronger. The more you delay, the more it fills your brain, but as soon as you begin to act, the fear will immediately disappear. Fear rises before you concrete wall, but as soon as you take a step forward, it turns out that this wall is illusory, and in fact it does not exist. Come to terms with your fear, accept it and just take a step towards it. Do not under any circumstances fight it. Admit: "Yes, I'm scared." But there is nothing wrong with confessing, because you are only human and have the right to be afraid. But when you admit it, fear will triumph and begin to subside. And you just start to act.

You can try to overcome fear in a purely logical way. When fear arises, think about the worst-case scenario in case you decide to act despite your fear.
And more scary? Usually, after evaluating the worst-case scenario, fear disappears. Even the worst option is not as scary as the unknown and fear itself. As soon as fear takes on a concrete face, it ceases to be a threat. The most powerful weapon of fear is the unknown. It appears so big and huge that it seems as if we will not survive what will happen as a result.
If, after evaluating the worst case, it is still scary, it is possible that the worst case is actually very bad. In this case, consider whether you have exaggerated the likelihood of a situation that will arise as a result of actions "despite the fear." If the assessment is real enough and the fear persists, then you need to consider whether it is really worth doing it. Because fear doesn't just happen. Fear is a defensive reaction. Maybe you should take action.

I will give two situations when fear is justified, and when it is not.

1. You are already 35 years old, and you are still not married, and you can’t propose to the only girl that you like and with whom you have been together for a long time. Of course, fear arises, because you are making an offer for the first time. Or maybe the previous girl refused you, and you are afraid of another rejection. What's the worst that can happen? She will refuse you. This is scary? No. If he refuses, then you need to look for another. The universe knows better, maybe this girl is not a couple for you, but somewhere out there the only one is still waiting. In this situation, we easily overcame fear.

2. You want to learn how to ski. You were brought to a very high and steep hill. Of course you are afraid. What is the worst case scenario if you do decide to go down? You will break your leg! Yes, a very real and very unpleasant option. You can hope for your luck and still start going down using the method of overcoming fear described above. As soon as you start descending, the fear will disappear. But maybe you should listen to your fear? Maybe it’s still worth walking down the hill and skiing where it’s safer and you won’t be so afraid to go down?

Just evaluate how your fear is justified. If he is really justified, listen to him, because he is your defense mechanism that can keep you out of trouble. If he is not justified and the worst option does not seem so terrible, go ahead.

How to overcome fear
METHOD 3: DECISION MAKING

Yes, it is the decision that makes you gather your courage and still do what you are afraid of. When you seriously set yourself up to do it, the fear goes away. Fear exists only where there is emptiness and uncertainty. Fear and doubt go hand in hand. If you destroy doubt, there will be no room for fear. This is where the solution comes in. When you decide to do something, doubts disappear. Everything, the decision is made, there is no way back. Why is fear so strong? It brings to mind unpleasant images of what we don't want and situations where we feel uncomfortable. As soon as fear arises, a person begins to scroll through the mind pictures of failure and failure. These thoughts immediately affect emotions in a negative way, and it is emotions that control our lives. With insufficient positive emotions, we lose the determination to act, and in a period of inaction, we strengthen our own worthlessness. It depends on your determination whether you will overcome fear or not. Fear keeps your mind focused on the negative set of circumstances, while decision focuses you on the positive. When you make a decision, you focus on how good it will be when you overcome fear, what you will get as a result, how your life will change for the better. This creates a positive attitude and, most importantly, that the mind is filled with good pictures, there is no room for fear and doubt. But remember, as soon as one negative thought creeps into your head (especially a thought related to fear), hundreds of the same thoughts immediately appear.

Just try this method. Say to yourself, "Even though I'm scared, I'm making the decision to do this and that." The eyes are afraid, but the hands are doing.

How to conquer fear
METHOD 4: PREPARATION.

So you know. what are you afraid of. This is already a big plus. So, you can prepare to overcome this fear. Preparation consists of two stages:

Representation

In the analysis phase, analyze your fear carefully. Answer your questions

What am I afraid of?

Why am I afraid?

Is it worth it to be afraid?

Does this fear have a rational basis?

What am I more afraid of: taking this action or that I will not achieve my goal?

Ask yourself other questions as you see fit. Analyze your fear as carefully as possible. Analysis is only the first part of the process. Fear is an emotion, analysis takes place at a logical level. Emotions are always stronger than logic. You can analyze everything very carefully, understand that your fear is meaningless, and yet you will continue to be afraid.

Now we proceed to the second stage - the presentation. Now we will fight against fear not with logic, but with emotions. A view is nothing but a visualization. You know what you're afraid of, so sit still and mentally run pictures of yourself doing what you're afraid of! The mind does not distinguish between imagined events and real ones. After you overcome fear many times in your imagination, it will be much easier for you to cope with this situation in reality, because the model of events has already been fixed at the subconscious level when you perform this action. The method of self-hypnosis is very powerful. Whatever happens, you can always apply it and you will be successful. Other methods of self-hypnosis can be used, but they are less effective against fear. The best is visualization. You will notice that even after a single five-minute visualization, it will be much easier for you to cope with fear.

And in conclusion, I want to warn you about something. In the article, I say that you fight fear, but you never really fight it. When you fight against him, he becomes stronger and takes over your mind even more. When it appears, acknowledge it. If you say to yourself that "I'm really afraid", it will not mean that you are a weakling. Everyone experiences fear, and only successful people have learned to act in spite of it. Masculinity is not the absence of fear, but the ability to act in spite of fear. When you admit that you are afraid, you can switch your thoughts to something else and take your mind off it. When you fight against him, you give him energy, and he becomes even stronger. You destroy fear only when you ignore it and get distracted by something else.

How to overcome fear
METHOD 5: COURAGE TRAINING

Our goal is to learn how to overcome fear so that it does not stand in our way as soon as we are about to make a decision or dare to do something. We will try to achieve the absence of intellectual fear. This will enable us to think clearly when it comes to making a decision.

The first thing to understand is that the problem is the fear itself, not the object of the fear. If we are afraid of rejection, then it makes no sense to fight against fear, trying to reduce the number of rejections. People are so afraid of fear that they have reduced to zero all situations where it can arise. They don't take any action at all. But this is a direct path to misfortune.

So the first step is to identify fear.

Imagine that training for courage is the same as training muscles in the gym. First you take a small weight, as much as you can lift. When you take this weight already easily, move on to a heavier weight and try to lift it. Likewise with fear. First you train yourself against a small fear, then move on to a bigger one. Let’s take the fear of public speaking as an example. You are afraid to speak in front of an audience of 1000 people. To get started, gather your friends and perform in front of them. Performing in front of 10 people isn't that scary. Next, gather 30 people and speak to them. If at this stage you have problems, you are afraid, you forget what you have to say, you get lost, train with such an audience until you get used to it and start to feel comfortable. Next, move on to an audience of 50 people. Then 100, 200, 500 and 1000.

Let's look at other options. For example, you are afraid of looking stupid. To stop being afraid, you need to do this, and the fear will pass. Practice. Especially in different situations, make yourself a fool and laugh at yourself.

If you are a shy and uncommunicative person, practice talking to people. Start by simply smiling at passers-by on the street. You will see people smile back at you. Of course, there will be those who will think that you are laughing at them, since you look at them and smile. But it's all right. Next, start greeting people. Just say, "Good afternoon." Say hello to passers-by. They will think that you are familiar, but they will not be able to remember you. Then try to start a light conversation. When you are standing in line, say something, start a conversation on some neutral topic, for example, just “How much I hate standing in lines” will already provoke a person to answer you: “Yes, I do too, but you have to stand in them and nothing can't be done." And the like. Start with some neutral topics of conversation, like the weather.

The bottom line is to first get used to overcoming small fears, and then to take on big ones.

Briefly, the process can be summarized as follows:

Identify your biggest fear

Break it down into at least 5 small fears

Start training to overcome the smallest (lightest) fear.

If you feel fear even before him, break this fear into several more.

Overcome your fears step by step

Train Constantly

By this method you will learn to overcome fear. If you do not train for a long time, you will soon have to start again with simple fears. Similarly, in the gym, if you have not trained for a long time, the muscles have lost the habit of heavy weight and you need to start again with a light one. Fear will continue to live in you, and as soon as you stop training, it will take its toll, and next time you will have to start over.

OTHER METHODS FOR OVERCOMING FEAR

Increasing your own self-esteem

There is such a pattern - the better you think of yourself, the less fear you experience. Your self-esteem seems to protect you from fear. And it doesn’t matter if this self-esteem is adequate or false. Therefore, people with high false self-esteem are often able to accomplish more than people with adequate self-esteem.

Faith in God (guardian angel, higher mind, superconsciousness ..)

When you believe in some higher entity, you trust that he/she will take care of you and it becomes less scary. The darkness of fear seems to be dissipated by the light of this higher power.

A man is able to conquer a very strong fear for the sake of the woman he loves. The same applies to mothers who do everything possible and impossible to raise their children.

In general, I want to note that any positive emotion helps to overcome fear, and any negative one interferes.